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About Tilburg

*Heavy breathing* I… am your father. Escort, huh? That lil’ Ford piece o’ crap. Slow, ominous tone drags me back—Brokeback vibes, man. “I wish I knew how to quit you,” I growl at its rusty ass. Been bouncin’ at clubs, seen escorts—cars, not the other kind—roll up. Pathetic, whiny engines. Pisses me off! Tiny, underpowered, like some punk tryin’ to flex. “You don’t know me, son,” I’d hiss at it.

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After my snack break, I get a call from the town hall. They need me to check out a rat problem near the park. I’m like, “Great, just what I need.” I get there, and it’s a whole family of rats. I’m talking like a rat convention. I’m ready to throw my hands up in despair.

Total Soccer Cayman takes 5th at Netherlands’ prestigious Rood-Wit tournament