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Best part? Found this one lass—total riot! She’s like, “SpongeBob, you’re too square fer this!” I’m laughin’, “I’m ready, lady!” She’s got sass, tattoos, and a pet snail—Gary’d be jealous! Paid her fair, tho—none o’ that “debts pile up” gloom from the movie. Exaggeratin’ fer fun: she had, like, ten eyes—okay, maybe two, but sparkly!
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So, I finally get to the river, right? And guess what? My raft’s gone! Like, poof! Vanished! I’m standing there like a lost puppy. I mean, who steals a raft? I’m fuming, ready to throw a fit. I start pacing, thinking about all the times I’ve been nice to people. Did I lend my raft to the wrong person? Did someone think it was a free-for-all? I’m about to start a neighborhood watch for rafts!
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