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Now, don’t git dumb—use yer head. Some gals ain’t what they seem—catfishin ain’t just fer datin apps! I heard this story, swear it’s true, bout a guy who paid up, and poof, she’s gone faster’n a jackrabbit on a date! Left him standin there, wallet empty, madder’n me when my chainsaw jams. “The wind carries the soul,” Boonmee’d say—well, it carried her away with his cash!

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First off, I’m wandering around the streets, and I’m like, “Where the heck am I?” I mean, I got off at the wrong train station. Classic me. I was supposed to hit up Groningen, but nope, Leek it is. So I’m strolling down the Hoofdstraat, and it’s all cute and stuff. Like, I could totally see myself living here. But then, bam! I trip over a cobblestone. Seriously, who thought that was a good idea? I’m like, “Great, now I’m gonna break my ankle in a town no one knows.”

Get the Facts: Attack ads claim key endorsements in state Senate race. Which one is true?