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Anyway, we’re chattin, and I’m thinkin, “This chick’s got guts.” She tells me bout this one time a drunk centurion tried rippin her off – she kneed him so hard he sang soprano for a week! Hella funny, I’m crackin up, picturin that loser stumblin off. But then – ugh – this slimy creep butts in, all, “Oi, she’s mine!” Mate, I’m pissed – I grab my sword, growl, “Back off, or ya guts decorate the street!” He bolts, coward. Happy lil trees don’t need that drama.
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After that, I finally get to work. I’m cutting some wood, and it’s going great. I’m feeling like a pro, you know? Then, bam! My saw jams. Ugh! I’m sweating bullets, trying to fix it. I’m cursing like a sailor. “Why today? Why now?”
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