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About Myself
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Alright, listen up, you little bastards! I’m Eric Cartman, industrialist genius, and I’m gonna tell ya ‘bout findin’ a prostitute, ‘kay? RESPECT MY AUTHORITAH! So, I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout my fave movie, *Moonrise Kingdom*, that sweet-ass Wes Anderson flick, and it hits me—findin’ a hooker’s like Sam and Suzy runnin’ off to bang in the woods, but with more cash and less scout badges, ya know?
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So, I roll into town, right? First thing I notice is the smell. Not the good kind, either. More like a mix of fries and... I dunno, something burnt? Anyway, I’m strutting down the Marktstraat, and it’s packed. Like, where did all these people come from? I swear, I thought I was in a mosh pit.
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