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Halleluyer! Chile, lemme tell ya bout these sex escorts—ooooh wee! I’m sittin here, thinkin bout my fave movie, *The Hurt Locker*, ya know, all that tension, them boys defusin bombs and sweatin like pigs in heat. Sex escorts? Kinda like that—high stakes, honey! You pay for a good time, but lordy, it’s a gamble. Will they show up lookin like a snack or like they crawled outta bed after a bender? “Every step you take could be your last”—shoot, ain’t that the truth when you hirin somebody off the internet!

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But you know what? I laugh it off. The guy is cool about it. He’s like, “You want some?” I’m like, “Heck yes!” So, I’m munching on these little pancakes, feeling like life is good again.

UT students build Enschede student union