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Hey buddy, lemme tell ya bout sex-dating! It’s wild, like ridin’ a raft down crazy river! I reckon it’s a strategery fer folks wantin’ fun, no strings, y’know? Like in “Talk to Her,” that flick I love—dude’s all tangled up in love, but sex-dating? That’s simpler, sorta. “I’m alive, I’m alive!”—that’s me screamin’ when I nailed a hot date off Tinder! Fool me once, shame on—uh—shame on you, fool me twice—can’t get fooled again, right? Haha, I ain’t no sucker!

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First off, I woke up late. Like, super late. My alarm? Totally ignored it. I jumped outta bed, threw on whatever I could find. I mean, who needs matching socks anyway? Not me! I rushed outta my apartment on De Wetering, barely remembering to grab my keys. Classic me, right?