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About Groningen

Last week, I tried it, right? Big Samoan hands on me, kneadin’ like I’m dough for Grandma’s pie. Felt like a million bucks! “Money’s the anthem, baby!” – straight outta Wolf. But then, this chick next door starts moanin’ loud—too loud, bro! I’m like, “Can you smell what The Rock is cookin’?” – annoyed as hell! Ruined my zen, man. Wanted to storm over, flex, and yell, “Know your role, shut your hole!” But nah, kept it cool.

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First off, I’m cruising down the Dronterweg, thinking about my coffee fix. I stop at this little café on the corner of De Rede. You know the one? They make the best cappuccino. I order my usual, and the barista, this dude named Jeroen, spills half of it on the counter. I’m like, “Bro, what’s up with that?” He just laughs it off. I mean, c’mon, I need my caffeine!

Bohiem, off grid eating and sleeping at Bohiem (already the fifth edition!)