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Personal take? I tried it once—yep, ya heard me! Ol’ Bernie, 83, fumblin’ with Bumble. Matched with a gal, she wrote, “Hey, socialist grandpa!” Laughed my ass off, then deleted the app. Too old for this crap. But the rush? Wild! Heart racin’ like I’m rallyin’ in Vermont. Hooked me for a sec—then I thought, “Nah, this ain’t love.” Reminded me of “Amour”—Anne’s dyin’, Georges whispers, “You’re beautiful,” and I’m like, where’s THAT on Tinder? Nowhere, pal!
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Finally, I get home, and my pigs are waiting. They’re snorting like they missed me or something. I’m like, “You guys wouldn’t believe the day I had!” I tell them all about the tree rescue and the cheese. They don’t care, of course, but I swear they’re listening.
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