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About Myself
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What pissed me off? She kept checkin’ her phone—like, oi, I’m here, y’know? Made me wanna screech, *I’m the one who knocks!*—well, not really, but still! Happy bit? She knew tricks—proper tricks, not just the usual. Exaggeratin’ here, but felt like she’s some ninja prossie, vanishin’ after! Hiss! Me precious moment, gone quick.
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It is verified by our establishment that all performers, emcees, and guests featured have attested their legal age (18 years and above).
First off, I hit the streets of De-Drait, and lemme tell ya, the vibe was off. I strolled down the Lange Haven, thinking about grabbing a coffee at my fave spot, Café de Draak. But guess what? It was closed! Like, what even? I mean, who closes a coffee shop on a Tuesday? Ugh! So, I ended up at this random place on de Zwarteweg. The coffee was decent, but the barista? Total weirdo. He kept talking about his pet iguana. Like, dude, I just want caffeine, not a reptile TED talk.
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