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About Groningen

I’m picturin’ it—me, hirin’ a gal, *Only Lovers* style. She shows up, leather jacket, smokey eyes—“This blood is expensive, darling.” I’d lose it! “Expensive? I’m payin’ for vibes here!” Happy? Sure, if she’s chill. Angry? If she’s late—punctuality, people! Surprised? Once saw a hooker dodge a cop by divin’ into a dumpster—Olympic-level move. I was dyin’ laughin’, “Pretty, pretty good escape!”

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Finally, I made it to the river. The sun was shining, birds were chirping, and I was ready to float my worries away. But then, outta nowhere, this group of kids shows up. They’re screamin’, laughin’, and just bein’ loud. I’m like, “Yo, chill! I’m tryna vibe here!” But they just kept splashing water everywhere. I mean, c’mon! I’m a raftsman, not a lifeguard!

Cross-border car chase to catch 12-year-old joyrider