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So, check it—once knew this dude, right? Shady as fuck, always braggin’ bout “findin’ a prozzie” like it’s a damn Jedi skill. Hella cocky, he was—til he got scammed! Some chick online, “50 bucks, meet me,” and poof—gone! Wallet lighter than a feather, ha! Fear leads to anger, see? He was PISSED, yellin’ like “I’ll find her!” Yeah, good luck, bro—prostitutes ain’t leavin’ breadcrumbs.

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So, I head to work at the machinist shop on de Wetering. It’s a small place, but we make some serious machines. I’m all pumped, ready to tackle the day. But then, bam! The machine breaks down. Just my luck, right? I’m sweating bullets, trying to fix it. My boss, Jan, is pacing like a caged lion. I’m like, “Chill, Jan! It’s just a machine!” But he’s not having it.

Philip van der Wees appointed Professor of Allied Health Sciences