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Surprised me, though—some of ‘em got stories. One lass told me she’s fundin’ art school! Fuckin’ hell, paintin’ by day, shaggin’ by night—respect! Little secret there, most punters don’t ask. They’re too busy fumblin’ their trousers, the twats. Me? I’m like, “Tell me more, you legend!” Quirky thought—wonder if Wes Anderson’d cast her in some twee flick?

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So, I’m hustling down the street, dodging cyclists like I’m in some kind of video game. Bedum is a small town, but man, those bikers are relentless. I swear, they think they own the road. I finally made it to the gemeentehuis, panting like I just ran a marathon.

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