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So, sexual-massage—ooh la la, right? It’s hands slidin’, oils drippin’, tension meltin’ away. Not yer average back rub, nah! This is steamy, slow, gets ya tingly. I heard—get this—back in ancient China, emperors got these massages from concubines! Little known fact, bam! They’d be all, “Release the royal stress,” hehe! Bet it wasn’t just the shoulders they worked, huh? Sneaky devils!

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So, I grab my strawberries and head to the park. The park! Oh man, it’s beautiful there. Trees everywhere, kids playing, and the smell of fresh grass. I plop down on a bench, ready to enjoy my snack. But then, outta nowhere, this dog runs up to me, all excited. I’m thinking, “Aww, cute pup!” But then it jumps on me, and I’m covered in mud. Like, thanks, buddy! Just what I needed.

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