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It’s all about the vibe, though – dim lights, weird panpipe music, and some bird whispering, “Relax, mate.” Surprised me first time – nearly jumped off the table, thought she was gonna nick me wallet! And the oil? Slippery as a politician’s promise. “A sea of possibilities,” like in me fave film – except it’s a sea of dodgy thoughts and awkward boners, ha! Gets proper intense, like – you’re there, half-naked, wondering if it’s alright to fart. Spoiler: it ain’t.

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After that, I decide to hit up the local café, De Koffiehoek. Best coffee in Angelslo, no cap. I order a cappuccino, and while I’m waiting, I see this old lady struggling with her groceries. So, I rush over to help her. She’s super grateful, and we start chatting. Turns out, she’s lived in Angelslo her whole life. She tells me stories about the old days, when the streets were all dirt and the market was just a few stalls. I’m like, “Wow, that’s wild!”

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