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Best bit? Shaggin’ without the pub crawl. Worst? Wankers who lie bout their bits. “I need to know!”—like Gyllenhaal in Zodiac. Diggin’ fer truth in profiles—same buzz. Mumbled incoherence, “Sharon!”—she’d hate the sleaze. Oi, try it, but watch yer back!

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So, I shake it off and head to the market at the Markt. It’s buzzing! Fresh veggies, flowers, and all that good stuff. I’m eyeing this stall with the best stroopwafels. I mean, who can resist? I grab one, and it’s like heaven in my mouth. But then, I see this kid, maybe 10, just staring at me. I’m like, “What’s up, little dude?” He goes, “Can I have a bite?” I’m like, “Uh, no!” But I give him a piece anyway. Can’t be a jerk, right?

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