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then he ghosted—surprised me, pissed me off.

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So, I’m fuming, but whatever. I get back to work. People start coming by, and I’m sharpening everything. Scissors, knives, you name it. I even had this old lady, Mrs. van Dijk, come by with her ancient garden shears. I’m talking rusty, like they’ve seen some serious action. She says, “Make ‘em sharp enough to cut through butter!” I laugh and say, “Lady, I’ll make ‘em sharp enough to cut through your ex’s heart!” She cackles, and I’m like, “Yup, this is why I love Yerseke.”

Estuarine biofilm patterns: Modern analogues for Precambrian self‐organization