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Yo, dude, it’s Bart Simpson here – Eat my shorts! So, sexual-massage, man, it’s wild! Like, you’re layin’ there, all chill, and some rando’s rubbin’ you down with oil – freaky, right? I’m thinkin’ of *A Prophet*, that badass flick, y’know? That line, “You’re not alone anymore,” hits when the masseuse gets all up in your space. Feels weirdly deep, dude.

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After a solid half hour of chaos, I finally catch the last one. I’m feelin’ like a hero, right? But then, I step in something. Yup, you guessed it. Rat poop. Ugh! I’m gagging, but I can’t let the lady see me like this. So, I just smile and say, “All good now!”