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love it, hate it, dunno—makes me cackle tho! some posh twat probly thinks it’s all glamour, champagne n silk sheets. nah, mate, it’s gritty as fuck. saw this doco once—girl in soho, 60s, right? said she’d hide her stash in a hollowed-out bible—trick was, punters never checked! proper clever, that. made me laugh, picturin some john flippin pages for a rubber. “where’s the action, vicar?” hahaha, idiots.

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But then, one of ‘em, this little girl with pigtails, hands me a drawing. It’s a rat with a cape. I’m touched, man. I’m like, “This is the best thing ever!” I hang it on my van.