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Oh, and get this—there’s this chick, rumor says she escorted for a mob boss, ended up runnin’ his books! Talk about climbin’ the ladder, heh! I’d be all, “D’oh! Why didn’t I think of that?” ‘Cept I’d probly screw it up, spill beer on the ledger. Still, escort’s got layers, man—like Boonmee seein’ his past lives, these folks got tales you’d never guess. “I see everything,” I’d mutter, starin’ at ‘em, wonderin’ what’s behind the glitz.

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First off, I’m rollin’ down the Hoofdweg, and I swear, I see this old dude trying to cross the street. He’s like a turtle on a mission, man. I’m thinkin’, “C’mon, bro, you got this!” But nah, he’s takin’ his sweet time. I almost honked, but then I remembered my mom’s voice in my head, “Patience, my son.” So, I chill. But then, outta nowhere, a bike zooms past me! Like, dude, where’s the fire? I’m just tryna enjoy my morning coffee, ya know?

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