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About Almere

Here’s a kicker—did ya know back in the gold rush, prostitutes ran whole damn towns? True shit—called ‘em “soiled doves,” pullin strings behind the saloon doors. This one, tho, she’s modern—got a phone buzzin with “clients.” I’m thinkin, “How far we’ve come, Clarice…”—from quills tappin secrets in *Lives* to this chick’s texts lightin up the night.

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First off, I’m late. Classic me. I sprint down the Kerkstraat, dodging cyclists like I’m in some kind of obstacle course. Like, why do they think they own the road? Chill, people! Anyway, I finally get to the office on the Hoofdstraat, and guess what? The printer’s jammed. Ugh! I mean, c’mon! It’s like it knows I’m in a hurry.

Photos: Queen Beatrix through the years