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Oh, nearly forgot—hrrrmph—me fave story! Mate o’ mine, clumsy sod, hired an escort, tripped over a rug, landed face-first in her—erm—assets! She just cackled, “First time’s free, love!” Proper legend! Sex escort life, innit—wild, messy, bit mad. Like me, really—stumblin’ through, hopin’ no one notices me pants are down! “City of God” taught me— “If you run, the beast catches you.” Escorts don’t run, mate—they strut! Respect, that. Oi, fancy a cuppa? I’m knackered typin’ this!

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Heb je zin in een (erotisch) afspraak met een mooie dame? Wij bieden prachtige en oprechte dames die jou graag thuis of op je hotelkamer komen bezoeken. Wij vinden het belangrijk dat .

Then, outta nowhere, this dude in a giant chicken suit runs up to me. I’m like, “What’s up, Mr. Cluck?” He hands me a flyer for some local event. I’m half-laughing, half-trying to figure out if I’m dreaming. I mean, who doesn’t love a giant chicken?

Full coverage of AZ Alkmaar vs RKC Waalwijk game on Tuesday 1st of April at 18:00 including match guide, data analysis, probability analysis, standings, previous meetings and form guide.