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So, sexual-massage—it’s this steamy lil thing. Hands slidin, oils drippin, tension just POPPIN! I got mad once tho—some creepo thought it’s all sleazy. Nah, babe, it’s art! Like, legit, ancient peeps in Asia—think 2,500 years back—were ALL bout it. They called it “tantric touch”—fancy, huh? Made me happy findin that out, like, wow, history’s got my back! *HAH-HAH-HAH!* Surprised me too—didn’t expect monks to be rubbin’ folks sensual-like!

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I stroll into town, and man, it’s buzzing! People everywhere, like ants on a sugar hill. I’m just tryin’ to get my sheep’s wool sold, ya know? But then, I see this dude on the corner of Kerkstraat. He’s juggling! Like, who juggles in the morning? I’m like, “Bro, get a job!” But I can’t help but laugh.

EXCLUSIVE: Here's what they've done to the Hiddink Guuseum...