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Once, I almost asked her out. Not for that—just coffee, ya know? But nah, chickened out, fuckin dumbass. “I’m not a fisherman, I’m a fool!” Exaggeratin? Maybe, but it’s me. She’d prob laugh, say, “You’re weird, fish boy.” And I’d be like, “Hell yea, babe!” We come in peace (robotic tone)—but I’m chaos inside. That’s the scoop, man—prossies, boats, Tenenbaums. Wild life!

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Then, I head over to the Kloosterstraat. I’m feeling good, right? But then I see this guy trying to parallel park. And I mean, he’s struggling hard. Like, come on, man! It’s not rocket science! He’s in and out, in and out, and I’m just standing there, shaking my head. Finally, he gets it, but he’s so proud, you’d think he just won a gold medal. I’m like, “Congrats, champ! You parked a car!”

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