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So, escort’s when someone’s paid to hang out. Not like me and SpongeBob, nah, we’re freebies! These folks get dolled up, fancy-like, and chill with ya—for a price. I was like, “Is mayonnaise an instrument?” when I heard that! Like, do they play tunes too? Nah, dude, it’s companionship, sometimes sneaky stuff. Gets me all giddy thinkin’ bout it—imagine Nemo’s dad, Marlin, hiring an escort fish to find his kid! “Righteous, righteous!” he’d yell, flippin’ fins.

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So, I finish up a coat for this lady, right? She wanted it for her dog. A dog! I mean, come on! But whatever, it’s a living. I’m sewing away, and then BAM! The power goes out. Just my luck! I’m sittin’ there in the dark, surrounded by fur. It’s like a horror movie waiting to happen. I’m thinkin’, “Great, now I’m gonna be the furrier who got eaten by his own furs.”

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