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I dig it, tho—makes me happy as hell! Like, who doesn’t wanna be rubbed down ‘til they’re mush? Little known fact: back in the ‘70s, these “massage parlors” were poppin’ up everywhere—half legit, half fronts for somethin’ naughtier. Shocked me silly when I read that—history’s wild, dude! Imagine some hippy chick in bell-bottoms, oilin’ ya up, whisperin’, “Relax, man, feel the cosmic flow.” Straight outta Anderson’s flick—“The past is just a groove, baby.”

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Then, outta nowhere, this old lady on a bike zooms past us. I swear, she was going like 100 km/h! I’m standing there, mouth agape, like, “Is this the Tour de France or what?” She shouts something in Dutch, probably telling us to get outta the way. Classic Sittard, right?

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