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But sometimes—rarely—it works. Buddy of mine, met his wife on Grindr. Grindr! Who knew?! Married now, happy as hell. I’m jealous, thinkin’, “Where’s *my* miracle, huh?” Like that baby in the movie—hope in the madness. Sex-dating’s a gamble, total crapshoot. You might get laid, might get catfished—50/50. Pretty, pretty good odds, if you’re nuts!

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So, I’m grumbling to myself, “Why’d I wear these shoes?” I mean, they’re cute, but not for puddle jumping. Anyway, I keep walking, trying to shake it off. I pass by the Randenbroekpark, and it’s packed. Families, kids, dogs—everyone’s out enjoying the sun. I’m like, “Why am I not at the park?” But nah, I gotta keep it movin’.

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