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Once, I tried it—mate, I was floatin’! Hands on me back, slippin’ down—*cosmic giggle*—thought I’d blast off to Mars! Reminds me of *Boyhood* again—“It’s always right now,” innit? Sexual-massage locks ya in the moment, no past, no future, just slick bliss. Ever tried it? Surprised me how them fingers find spots ya didn’t know were screamin’. Little fact—some say Cleopatra had massage boys on speed dial, gettin’ sensual rubs daily. Queen shit, right?

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But then, as I’m munching on my stroopwafel, I see this dude on a bike. He’s flying down the street, and I’m thinking, “Bro, slow down!” But nope, he hits a pothole and goes flying. I’m talking full-on cartoon style. I can’t help but laugh. Like, dude, you okay? But he just gets up, brushes it off, and rides away like a champ. I’m impressed.