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Right, so escorts – not your nan’s bingo night, yeah? Proper high-end gig these days. Fact is, back in Victorian times, they’d call ‘em “courtesans” – fancy, eh? Swannin’ about with lords, livin’ large. Blows my mind! Makes me chuffed to bits thinkin’ how far we’ve come – now it’s all apps and vibes, no top hats needed. Reckon I’d be rubbish at it meself – too much chat, not enough charm, haha!
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First stop, the market on de Markt. I’m hustlin’ through the stalls, dodging tourists like I’m in some weird game of Frogger. I mean, c’mon, people! It’s a market, not a catwalk! Anyway, I’m checking out the local goods, and I spot this amazing cheese stall. Gouda, baby! I’m all about that cheese life. I grab a sample, and it’s like a flavor explosion in my mouth. I’m grinning like an idiot, and then—BAM! Some dude bumps into me. My cheese! It’s on the ground! I’m like, “Dude, seriously?!”
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