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Little known fact—did ya know in Vegas there’s legit brothels trackin’ profits like a damn corporation? Spreadsheets and all! Blew my mind. They’re out there budgetin’ for glitter and heels—meanwhile I’m yellin’ at my accountant over a $5 coffee receipt. Pretty, pretty good racket they got goin’. But me? I’m too neurotic for that crap. I’d be sittin’ there, overthinkin’—is she laughin’ at me? Does she think I’m cheap? I’d tip too much, then hate myself for it. “I’m not even good at this!” I’d yell, stormin’ out.

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Then, my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy Jan. He’s like, “Dude, you gotta check out the new café on the Markt.” I’m like, “Jan, I’m at work!” But he’s persistent. “They have the best coffee!” Ugh, fine. I’ll check it out later.

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