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About The Hague

Once heard this story—some dude in Thailand got a sexual-massage with, like, snakes slitherin’ on him! Freaky as hell, right? Called it “serpent therapy”—supposed to awaken yer “chi” or whatever. Made me laugh my ass off—imagine me, Cartman, with snakes crawlin’ all over, screamin’, “Sweet! This is so badass!” Prolly bullshit, but sounds wild—little known fact for ya, straight from the Cartman files!

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So, I’m wandering around, and I stumble into this little café on de Kerkstraat. The smell of coffee hits me like a brick wall. I order a cappuccino, and the barista, this dude with a crazy beard, spills half of it on me. I’m like, “Dude, what’s your deal?” He just laughs. I mean, come on! I’m not a coffee sponge!