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Exaggeratin’? Maybe. But I’ve seen dudes send d*ck pics with filters—bro, why? Keep it classy! Me, I’m all about the chase, the vibe, the “maybe she’s the one.” Tho, real talk, I’d rather watch Boonmee again than swipe for hours. “The wind is strong tonight,” movie says—yeah, and it’s blowin’ me away from this nonsense sometimes.

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So, we head over there, and it’s packed! I mean, who knew Noord-Hofland had such a vibrant art scene? I see this painting that looks like a toddler went wild with crayons. I’m standing there, trying to act all sophisticated, but inside I’m cracking up. Like, “Is this art or a cry for help?”