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About Eindhoven

Quirky. Thought. Sexual-massage. Should. Be. Olympic. Sport! Judges. Scoring. Technique! “10. For. That. Glute. Grab!” Ha! Exaggerating? Maybe. But. Imagine. The. Crowd!

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First off, I head down to the Kerkweg. You know, the main drag. I’m just minding my own business, sharpening some knives, when this dude rolls up. He’s got a fishing rod, right? And he’s like, “Yo, can you sharpen my hook?” I’m like, “Dude, I’m a sharpener, not a miracle worker!” But whatever, I give it a shot. Turns out, he’s a pro fisherman from the Loosdrechtse Plassen. He starts telling me about this massive pike he caught last week. I’m like, “Cool story, bro, but I’m not gonna catch any fish with a dull hook!”