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About Groningen

Last week, this dude’s yammerin’ at my bar—met a chick online, thought he’s gettin’ laid. She shows up, brings her MOM. Her MOM! I laughed so hard I spilled whiskey. Poor bastard’s sittin’ there, red-faced, while I’m thinkin’, “Don’t pee on my leg, pal, you ain’t slick!” Sex-dating’s a gamble—sometimes ya win, mostly ya lose. Gets me mad, tho—why all the games? Just say ya wanna bang, quit the poetry!

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So, we’re walking, and I’m trying to keep up. He’s all excited about the local history, and I’m just trying not to trip over my own feet. We hit up the park near de Dijk. It’s got this nice little pond. I swear, I saw a duck that looked like it was judging me. Like, “What’s this human doing here?”

Extra security on Breda buses after armed robbery