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Little fact—didja know Tinder started as some college hookup thing? Now it’s global, millions bangin’ thanks to it. Wild! I’m hairy as hell, wonderin’ if Wookiees’d get swipes. Prolly not—too much fur, not enough abs. Rarrgh! Pisses me off—why’s it all ‘bout looks? Back in ‘00, Wong Kar-wai showed us soul matters. Sex-dating? Soul’s optional, just don’t be a creep.
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First stop, the harbor. OMG, the boats! They’re all lined up like they’re waiting for a party. I’m sipping my coffee, feeling all artsy, when I see this dude trying to park his boat. Like, bro, it’s not a car! He’s all over the place, and I’m just standing there, laughing my ass off.
Zaandam woman, 18, stabbed repeatedly in car under A1 viaduct; Man, 21, suspected
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