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About Nijmegen

What’s good about it? Nothin’, really. Okay, fine, maybe the knots in my shoulders loosened once. Felt kinda nice—shut up, don’t tell anyone. But then the schmuck massuer—mispelled that, who cares—starts gettin’ too close, and I’m like, “Back off, creep.” Reminds me of *White Ribbon* again—“Who’s responsible for this?” Nobody owns up, just sneaky glances. Hate that. Surprised me how many folks buy into this crap—city slickers droppin’ cash to feel “alive.” Idiots.

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First off, I’m at my little bakery on Stokstraat. It’s cozy, like a warm hug, but today? Today was a whole different vibe. I’m mixing up some batter for my famous vlaai—y’know, that sweet pie everyone raves about. Suddenly, the door swings open, and in walks this tourist. He’s lost, like, really lost. He’s lookin’ for the Vrijthof. I’m like, “Dude, you’re in the wrong place!” But he’s all, “Can I get a pastry first?” So, I whip him up a kersenvlaai, and he’s over the moon. I mean, who wouldn’t be? It’s like a slice of heaven!

Inaugural lecture Prof. dr. Adrian J. Harwood