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Once heard this story—some dude in Thailand got a sexual-massage with, like, snakes slitherin’ on him! Freaky as hell, right? Called it “serpent therapy”—supposed to awaken yer “chi” or whatever. Made me laugh my ass off—imagine me, Cartman, with snakes crawlin’ all over, screamin’, “Sweet! This is so badass!” Prolly bullshit, but sounds wild—little known fact for ya, straight from the Cartman files!

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Then, we stroll down to the Lunteren Windmill. It’s iconic, right? But guess what? It’s closed for maintenance. I’m fuming! I mean, c’mon! How do you close a windmill? It’s not like it’s a restaurant! I’m trying to explain to my group why it’s a big deal, but they’re just snapping pics of the outside. I’m like, “Guys, it’s not just a pretty face!” But whatever, I guess they’re happy, so I try to chill.

Luke Bradnam, Weather Reporter Gold Coast News Team