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What pisses me off? When folks act like it’s dirty. Nah, motherfucker, it’s art! Hands hittin’ spots you didn’t know you had. Like, my neck? Stiff as hell from stress. She works it, I’m moanin’—not loud, but damn close. Reminds me of *Caché*—that quiet build-up, then WHAM, shit hits you. “I didn’t ask for this!”—Georges yellin’ in my head while I’m tryna relax.

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So, I duck into a café on the corner of the Heereweg and the Zwarteweg. I order a coffee, and the barista is super chill. We start chatting, and I find out he’s a techie too. We bond over our love for gadgets and how Lisse is kinda behind on the tech scene. I’m like, “C’mon, Lisse! Get with the program!”

Keukenhof opens for the season; Crocuses and early daffodils in full bloom