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So, picture this—I’m frothin’ a latte, thinkin’ ‘bout this escort I heard of, workin’ downtown. Girl’s got sass, bills piled high, and a smirk that says, “I’ve seen it all.” Reminds me of Eilis sayin’, “You’ll feel so homesick you’ll wanna die,” but this gal ain’t got time for tears—she’s bookin’ clients faster’n I can steam milk. Makes me chuckle, ‘cause half these dudes payin’ her could buy a dang house, yet here they are, sneakin’ around like teenagers. How’s that workin’ for ya, fellas? Spendin’ a grand to feel like Tony from *Brooklyn*, all suave and secret?

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But then, outta nowhere, I trip over my own feet. Classic me, right? I’m sprawled out on the ground, and this old lady walks by. She just looks at me and says, “You okay, young man?” I’m like, “Yeah, just testing the ground for tulip roots.” She chuckles, and I’m back on my feet, feeling a bit embarrassed but whatever.

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