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Alright, Gaming Community, listen up! Escort missions, ugh, total crapshoot, right? Makes me wanna scream like Chow Yun-fat in *Crouching Tiger*! Dr. Evil style – pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars,” I’d pay to ditch ‘em. You know, babysit some dumb NPC, they stumble into every trap? Drives me nuts! Reminds me of Yu Shu Lien – “A faithful heart makes wishes come true” – yeah, wish these escorts weren’t so brain-dead!

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Then, I hear this loud crash outside. I rush to the window, and there’s a car accident right in front of me! Some guy in a bright red car just rear-ended a delivery van. I’m thinking, “Dude, you really need to pay attention!” But then I see the driver of the van get out, and he’s laughing. Like, what? Is this a comedy show too?

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