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About Almere

So, escorts—here’s the dirt. Been around forever, swear it! Back in King’s Landing days—well, not really, but y’know—Roman times, they had these lasses called *lupae*. Means she-wolves, how’s that for a laugh? Howlin’ at the moon while they’re at it! Got me cacklin’, that did, ‘til I heard some posh twat sayin’ it’s “empowerin’.” Empowered my arse—half of ‘em are dodgin’ fists or worse. Made me proper mad, that. Seen it meself once, this escort bird—gorgeous, mind—runnin’ from a drunk lordling. Wanted to gut him, I did, but she just smirked and scarpered.

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First off, I hit up the local café on de Dijk. Best coffee in town, no cap. I grab my usual, a cappuccino with extra foam. I’m all set to dive into the day. But then, I spill half of it on my shirt. Great start, right? I’m standing there like a total klutz, trying to wipe it off with a napkin. Spoiler alert: it didn’t work.

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