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About Rotterdam

Alright, so sex-dating, huh? Total shitshow, lemme tell ya! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout it—like, why’s everyone so obsessed? Swipin’ right, hookin’ up, no strings—sounds fun, right? Pfft, nah, it’s a freakin’ trap! Like in *Oldboy*, “Laugh and the world laughs with you”—but cry? You’re solo, babe. I tried it once—met this dude, total hottie, thought I’d scored. Nope! Ghosted me faster than you can say “I can see Russia from my house!” Legit, I was pissed—wasted my mascara for that jerk!

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Jan shows up, looking all serious. “We need to check the cameras,” he says. So we head to the nearest shop on Hoofdstraat. The owner’s a grumpy old man, always complaining about something. Today, it’s the weather. “It’s too hot for this nonsense!” he grumbles. I’m like, “Dude, it’s Klundert. It’s always something.”

Candidate: Theo Van Klundert