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Oh, and get this – funny bit – her pimp’s this geezer, looks like a bleedin’ walrus, mustache and all! I’m crackin’ up, thinkin’, “This cat’s a right muppet!” Nearly blew the deal laughin’, but I kept it cool, yeah. In me head, I’m like, “Austin, you’re a legend, shaggin’ through time!” Wrapped it up quick, no faff, just fun – “It’s all in the past now,” like the movie says, and I’m off, smilin’.

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Finally, we get the action figures back. The guy’s over the moon. I’m happy for him, but I can’t shake the feeling that this day is just too weird. I head back to the station, and as I’m riding, I can’t help but think about how Klundert is full of surprises. One minute, I’m sipping coffee, and the next, I’m chasing a kid for toys.

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