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Here’s a kicker—did ya know some freaks on these apps use fake names? Like, straight-up aliases! I read somewhere, this one guy, “Brad,” was really a Vinny from Bayonne, catfished a dozen dames before they caught him. Wild, right? Sex-dating’s got more masks than a Halloween store. “Re-enact it,” they said in the movie—well, these jokers re-enact a whole damn life!

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First stop: the old school on Kloosterstraat. I’m supposed to install some new sound system for the kids. You know, make their music lessons a bit more lit. But when I get there, the principal’s like, “Oh, we forgot to order the speakers.” Are you kidding me? I’m standing there, looking like a fool with my tools, and no speakers!

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