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Then there’s the good stuff. Hooked up with this dude—tattooed, chill AF. We clicked, no bullshit. Happy vibes all night—thought, “This is my precious!” Sex-dating can surprise ya, like when Tom’s kid catches him off-guard. “You’re a hero, Dad!”—felt that glow, ya dig?

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So, I’m checkin IDs, right? And this dude, I swear, he’s got a fake ID that looks like it was printed on a home printer. I’m like, “Bro, you think I’m blind?” He gets all defensive, starts yellin’ about his rights. I’m just tryin’ to do my job, man! I told him to hit the road, and he storms off, muttering something about “discrimination.” Like, dude, it’s not discrimination if you’re not even 18!

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