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So, escort—fancy word for a hired shadow, right? Not just sex, nah, don’t be daft. It’s company, arm candy, someone to smirk at your enemies with. Back in the day, like medieval times, they had “courtesans”—fancy escorts who’d charm kings and stab ‘em in the back. Little known fact: some reckon Cleopatra was the OG escort, playing Caesar like a lute. Makes me grin, that—power in a wink. I’d have her head on a spike, tho, for stealing my thunder.

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Finally, I get to the site. It’s a small house, but the lady, oh man, she’s a piece of work. She’s all like, “I need this done yesterday!” Lady, chill! I’m not a magician! So, I start measuring the windows, and guess what? I realize I forgot my favorite tool. The one I call “The Glass Whisperer.” Ugh! I could’ve screamed.

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