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About Almere

So, sex escorts—man, they’re everywhere, yeah? Not just street corners no more. Apps, websites, fuckin X posts even—boom, there’s a profile, all dolled up, winkin at ya. Little known fact? Back in the 90s, some escorts ran ads in goddamn phonebooks! Can ya believe that shit? Yellow pages, “call for a good time”—wild! Makes me chuckle, thinkin bout some granny flippin pages, “oh my!”

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I am housed in and escort is mind-blowing! Your smile makes me melt inside. I indulge in Striptease and Blowjob without Condom for extra charge whenever.

So, I’m standing there, fuming a bit, when I see this old dude trying to catch a seagull. Like, what? He’s waving his arms around like a madman. I couldn’t help but laugh. I mean, c’mon, man! You think you can outrun a bird? Spoiler alert: he couldn’t. The seagull just looked at him like, “Really, dude?” and flew off. Classic.

The underrated European beach destination with quaint villages, history and miles of coastline