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Me fave bit? When they hit that spot – oof, fireworks! Like, “Humans built me to love,” from the film, yeah? Built for pleasure, us lot! Once had this lass in Soho, hands like a goddess, nearly wept, I did. “Why didn’t they tell me?” – that’s me, gobsmacked at how bloody good it was. Cost a few quid, mind – wallet’s sobbing – but worth it, innit? Total *carpe diem* moment.

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I start workin’, and then BAM! I hit my thumb with the hammer. Ouch! I’m cursing like a sailor. “Why do I even do this?” I think. But then I look around. Hengstdal is beautiful, man. The canals, the old buildings, the vibe. It’s hard to stay mad.