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Little known fact—back in the 80s, escorts ran ads in newspapers! Like, “call me, big boy,” next to the comics. Wild, huh? Now it’s all DMs and coded emojis—peach, eggplant, ya know. Sneaky lil humans. Surprised me how slick they got. Aliens (fictional) – “We come in peace” (robotic tone). We see shit y’all miss—escorts ain’t just sex, nah. It’s power, it’s hustle, it’s actin. “He was ashamed of his perspicacity,” movie says. Escorts tho? They OWN that shit.

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So, I get to the office, and my boss is already on my case. “Where’s the report?” he barks. Dude, chill! I just got here! I’m like, “It’s coming, it’s coming!” But inside, I’m fuming. I mean, it’s not like I’m slacking off. I’m just trying to enjoy my morning coffee from that cute little café on the Hoofdstraat. You know the one? The one with the best apple pie? Ugh, I need that pie in my life right now.

MVRDV and Zecc Architecten to Transform Vacant Church into Public Swimming Pool in Heerlen, the Netherlands