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About Tilburg

Escorts ain’t just hookers, tho—surprise, bitches! Some dude in the 1800s, fancy-ass lord or somethin’, hired a gal to escort him to a ball. Not bangin’, just struttin’. True story, look it up, I ain’t lyin’! Made me laugh my ass off—imagine payin’ top dollar for a date that don’t even put out. Respect my authoritah, I know shit!

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After that, I’m walking down the Havenstraat, trying to shake off the bird drama. The harbor’s beautiful, boats bobbing, and I’m feeling good again. But then, I see this group of tourists. They’re lost, looking at their phones like they’re trying to decode hieroglyphics. I’m like, “C’mon, guys! Just look up!” So, I go over, and they’re trying to find the Dolfinarium. I’m like, “Dude, it’s just down the road!” But they’re all, “We thought it was a myth.” A myth? Really? It’s a whole aquarium with dolphins!

Netherlands ok's killer whale move to Canary Island park